12/30/2012 - Merry Christmas! Happy New Year!

Thank you for your prayers concerning our meeting with the bone marrow transplant specialist in Hershey back on the 14th.  We had a great meeting and he spent about an hour and a half with us as he explained much about myeloma and the transplant procedure.  He oversees many, many myeloma patients, but I continue to maintain my “unique constellation” status as only about one to two percent of the multiple myeloma patients at Hershey are in my age group, and significantly fewer still are this young without genetic markers that point to aggressive myeloma (markers which I have been tested for and don’t have).  It was a very positive discussion, and the details of the bone marrow transplant procedure are less daunting than we had previously thought.  We had thought I would be in the hospital for a month with no immune system, but it’s more like a three week process.  The first week is pretty low-key, where they collect stem cells from my blood, which is followed by a two week process of killing and reviving my bone marrow.  By the end of the two weeks, I should be fine to go home, but will still have to be careful as my immune system builds back up to full strength.

We had a second opinion for a bone marrow transplant consultation scheduled for the 27th in Philadelphia, but the doctor got sick and we are rescheduled for Monday the 31st.

Last week was also a bit up-and-down as I met with both an orthopedic surgeon and my neurologist about my back pain (not knowing that they serve the same purpose in my case).  Seeing my vertebrae for the first time, the orthopedic surgeon was very concerned, which got me very concerned, with the integrity of the bone as it is now.  It sounded like surgery was probably necessary, but this was based off of an X-ray, which isn’t very good compared to CAT scans.  He ordered me a new back brace, which is kind of makes me feel like I’ve got a Batman suit on, and wanted to schedule another appointment for after my CAT scan was done.  After meeting with him, I got another CAT scan and met with the neurologist that initially assessed me in the hospital.  He works with many multiple myeloma patients and put our minds at ease about a lot of stuff.  He agreed with getting the new back brace, but was very optimistic (based on his experience with vertebral tumors in myeloma patients) that the bone will heal itself over the course of time.  Not completely to where it was before, but to where there would be no issue with the strength of the bone, and the back pain may go away over the course of the healing.  So we’ll be exercising our patience and continue to pray for healing.

Over the last month or so, I’ve had some conversation with friends of different beliefs that got me thinking about sin and cancer and faith.  I was humbled by God's Spirit as I pondered more on the reason for suffering and trials in our lives and found myself thinking some pretty arrogant thoughts.  It is my sinful condition that ultimately caused the decay of my body... maybe not anything specifically I have done, but when sin entered the world from the first man, it was inherited by all people and subjected all of creation to decay and death… and for us, we have all been subject to its consequence: "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” “For the wages of sin is death…" Romans 3:23, 6:23 (not just the decay and death our physical body is subject to, but really the spiritual death that results apart from salvation through Jesus Christ).  So I don’t think I have cancer because of something I did directly, which could be a popular thought back in the times of the Old Testament of the Bible, or with those who believe in Karma, or in other faiths I unfortunately don't know enough details about, but it is ultimately a result of sin, which I was born into, guilty of from the beginning of my life.  But as I've said before, there is a purpose here for me and I think that without these trials in our lives, it would be difficult, if not impossible, for a Christian's faith to be evident at all.  Our lives should be marked not by a life that is free from trouble or tragedy just because we have put our faith in Jesus, but marked by how we respond to the troubles and tragedy that come with a sinful and evil world (even present in our own decaying bodies) because of the hope we have in the promised salvation for those who give our lives to Him… a salvation that releases us from the power of sin over our lives now, and rescues us into eternal life with God when Christ returns to make all things right.  "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade — kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time." - 1 Peter 3-5.

I've also been reflecting on the peace God is giving me.  It applies somewhat to the previous thoughts, but I have noticed how comforting it is to rest on the hope of the new body I will receive through the salvation of Christ after this one dies and all things are made new.  I will take care of this one the best I can because I think that's what God wants from us, and it glorifies Him, but there is only so much I can do... or anyone can do… nobody can live forever by their own power.  But by being worked on by so many doctors lately, I am better understanding the Bible's explanation of our bodies as "vessels," which expresses a separation of our mortal bodies and our eternal souls.  Because most of the doctors know the body, statistics of treatments, have lots of tools and drugs, and can fix bodies, I feel a lot like a car in the shop.  They tend to focus only on the physical side of things, which shouldn’t be surprising since that’s what they’ve been trained for and get paid for.  But don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean they aren't compassionate, they have all been wonderful and I feel very blessed by the care I am able to be under because of my job, insurance, country, location, and the wonderful people who have dedicate their lives to helping others in the medical field... it's amazing really.  So, I'll do my part to keep this "car" in tip-top shape (which thankfully I have a wonderful wife who has already done so much for me over the past 10 years already!), and we’ll continue to trust God to guide us to the expert "mechanics" that are going to diagnose the problems, and be able to do what I can't do myself to keep this "car" running, and running smoothly.  Funny place to find peace, but I'm a funny guy sometimes.

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